Friday, October 31, 2014

{this moment} 13 Days Old

{this moment} - A Friday ritual. A single photo - no words - capturing a moment from the week. A simple, special, extraordinary moment. A moment I want to pause, savor and remember. 

Monday, October 27, 2014

Posy's Birth Story

Posy is sleeping for the moment, so I am going to try to do this as fast as I can!  You see, the story of her birth actually starts a week before she was born.  Exactly one week before her birth I got food poisoning.

I have only ever had this once before in my life and it wasn’t really that bad.  I mean, I remember feeling crummy and pretty angry at that pizza place that used bad meat.  But this?  This was a whole other kettle of fish.  This was bad.

We still have no idea how I got it.  With gestational diabetes, there was not much fun eating going on in my life.  In fact I remember being quite angry when I went to the doctor before I got sick and saw I gained a pound.  I gained a pound eating lettuce?  Pregnant or not, that seemed rather unfair.  So there was no to little eating out going on at all.

Saving you the nasty details, I was sicker than sick.  I was retaining nothing and dropped ten pounds in a matter of days.  It was the first time in my life I can recall actually not wanting to drink anything, let alone eat.  That was the scariest part.  I would try and drink but I was so weak and sick that it was like torture.

I ended up getting an IV for dehydration.  The baby was looking good on all the stress tests I was going to despite being ill.  But the weight loss and inability to eat or drink was starting to scare me. 

I was scheduled to be induced on the 16th,  due to the gestational diabetes, but that was impossible.  Yet, in the back of my head I kept thinking that eventually I was going to have to do this.  I was so ill, and although getting better, I was worrying that this was all starting to have an effect her. 

I called my doctor and we discussed my symptoms and decided that I should be induced on the 18th.  I was scared out of my mind.  I was so weak, how was I possibly going to be able to give birth!?!  That was when I realized that I would probably have an epidural.

I had wanted to avoid that at all costs, considering that due to my low blood pressure, things get funky when I do have an epidural.  After talking to one nurse, however, she told me there are things they can do to avoid my nearly passing out and needing oxygen.  I didn’t even want to think about what drugs they were going to shoot me up with!

So at 5 AM Tony and I headed to the birth center where I have given birth to more than half of my babies.  I was doing better but still not quite myself.  Everything was a go.  They checked and I was already 4 ½ cm.  I can’t tell you how excited this made me.  I mean, I was ecstatic.  I had never gone into even natural birth that progressed!  This was probably due to the fact that the night of the 16th I thought I was in labor.  I knew it wasn’t true labor, though, because the pain was too strong too fast.  I was unable to breath during the pains and basically scared everyone in the house.  I wondered, too, if it just wasn’t food poisoning mocking me by giving me horrendous pains every 15 minutes like clockwork!

Now before I go on, please do not hate me.  Think for a moment of the fact I had been in constant pain and misery for a week.  That unable to eat or hardly drink, I was about to give birth.  I think God might have taken a bit of pity on me.

All day I felt the contractions but they didn’t hurt.  The nurses kept asking me if I even felt them.  I shrugged with an “I guess so.”  The weirdest part?  Posy was facing the wrong way, so I was in back labor all day.

When I was about 6 cm (around 1 PM), the doctor came and broke my water.  I told the nurse that maybe I should get that epidural.  My husband was skeptical.  Only a week ago I told Tony adamantly that I did NOT want at epidural.  He shifted uncomfortably and the nurse sweetly suggested I take a shower.

This is a huge thing.  I never got to move around during labor before.  Only with my first but most of it I was confined to my bed.  Not this time.  They hooked me up so I was mobile and I believe this made all the difference.

I got into the shower, I didn’t want a bath because my thoughts were to let gravity help me.  I stayed in that shower for 45 minutes.  Tony kept poking his head into the bathroom asking me how I was with a side comment of “Wow, that was a good one.”  He was not taking his eyes off the monitor.

After the 45 minutes, I started to wonder if perhaps I should go lay down before I couldn’t stand anymore.  I could feel the contractions but, again, they didn’t really hurt.  I psyched myself up in the shower too.  I wasn’t going to get an epidural.  I was going to do this without and offer it all up for my family and the struggles we have been fighting.  Then I stepped out of the shower and...

Hello transition!

I grabbed Tony around the neck as the nurse tried to dry me off.  Forget modesty this was not what I was expecting!  I couldn’t breathe it took me so much by surprise.  They were telling me to breathe but all I could do was moan and hang on to Tony.  He told me later he was getting frantic, knowing we had to get me to the bed, but I wouldn’t budge.  He told me we needed to move but I insisted I needed to catch my breath.  That was impossible of course because the contractions were one right on top of the other.

I struggled to make one step towards the bathroom door and that was when my eyes bulged out of my head and I proclaimed, “I HAVE TO PUSH!” 

Everything happened at once.  I recall the nurse literally grabbing me and pushing me to the bed, with her hand between my legs in case the baby fell out or something.  The doctor, again by some sort of miracle, walked in at that moment.  I was on the bed but I wasn’t pushing no matter how bad I wanted to because they hadn’t checked me.  Shouldn’t they check to make sure I was 10 cm?  I was making a raucous, which I never do… well, in labor... but I was trying not to push.

The doctor finally told me to go ahead and push.  I gave a little push because they still hadn’t checked to see if I was 10 cm.  I mean, I've done this a few times and generally there is a procedure with these things.  But they insisted I give it my all.  The doctor asked Tony if he wanted to catch the baby, but there was no way I was letting go of his hand.  I could squeeze that all I wanted and not feel guilty about hurting him.  Those sweet nurses didn't deserve my vise like grip.  I was not letting Tony go anywhere.

Only a few pushes and our sweet little Posy was here at 1:55 PM.  Once I put my heart into the pushing it was fast and the nurse actually had to help the doctor catch her!  Everything went quickly and we were soon left alone with our baby, to cuddle and nurse her for the first time. 

She weighed 7lbs 13 ounces, was 19 inches long, and had a 14-inch head.  Typical for this family! 

We have since had a bit of trouble with nursing but it is getting better.  Her weight dropped significantly after birth and we were afraid I would have to supplement.  Due to the food poisoning my body was weak and had very little to give.  But, luckily, after birth my appetite came back full force. The pediatrician was actually surprised considering what I had been through that my milk came in as soon as it did.   He told me to eat, nurse, eat, nurse, and then eat some more.  Carbo-load like a football player about to play the Super Bowl, basically.  Tony stopped at a New York style pizzeria on the way home and got me a huge slice of Hawaiian and a Coke.  Next day she had gained a whole 4 ounces!

We are still fighting a bit of an uphill battle.  Tony actually had to leave the hospital on the day she was born to take Tiger to the doctor.  He had pink eye.  Can you believe it?  And then a cold started its way through the house and is not wanting to let go.  I am focusing on trying to heal from everything.  It is going slowly but surely!

Well, perfect time.  Posy has awoken.  She is sitting next to me with her fluff of black hair and what appears to be blue eyes, which will most likely turn hazel before her first birthday.  Time to nurse and then enjoy a bath!

Thursday, October 23, 2014

{p,h,f,r} Welcome Posy

After quite an adventure our sweet Posy was born.  I will try and write up all the craziness soon.  Until then, I would like to introduce you to our newest and sweet little family member.




Took this one at 3 AM, folks.  Yup, she is WIDE awake!


Thursday, October 9, 2014

{p,h,f,r} Where For Art Thou Autumn?

Joining the gang over at Like Mother, Like Daughter for some {p,h,f,r} fun.


It should be fall.  It isn't.  I would love to post a photo all autumnal and lovely, something to make your heart long for pumpkin spice anything, but bah humbug.  So I will post a picture from LAST fall, just to pretend...

This was actually almost exactly a year ago.  Bare feet mind you, but long sleeves and leaves.  Sigh.  I'm not bitter, I'm not bitter, I'm not bitter...


This story starts sad but ends up happy, trust me.  The kids recently purchased some Angora bunnies, super cheap (they were headed to the doggie treat factory).  Everyone has been fawning over them and loving them.  The sad thing was one of them was not well when we got him.  We had no clue and suddenly he was gone.  There were many tears.  When we realized he was ill we rushed him to the farm where he was born but there was no hope and nothing we could do.

The people were so sorry and so sweet as to give us another rabbit.  Daisy picked out this one.  We think she looks like a Regina... a bit like the evil queen from Once Upon a Time.  :)


We have been praying an eveing rosary as a family (well, whoever is at home, which these days is rarely everyone!) for the National 54 Day Rosary Project.  It has been a huge blessing!  One funny little note is that poor Bear falls alseep almost every night somewhere in the midst of it.  Culred up on the floor or daddy, it doesn't matter.  I guess he finds it very soothing!


Here I am at 37 weeks.  My selfie game is not strong, as my teens would say.  I mean let's just pretend the obvious spots on the mirror are actually some cool effect I added.

Well at my OB appointment yesterday they said this is it.  I am ready to pop.  Due to my age (because I am sooooooo old) and the GD they want to induce me next week.  So say some prayers for me and hopefully this sweet little girl will come on her own, before that??

Wednesday, October 8, 2014

{yarn along} October 8th, 2014

I really miss blogging, but being able to do so with all that is going on (getting ready for baby, schooling 5 out of 8 kiddos, plus the general chaos that life in a big family can create) it has been hard to fond a moment!  Most moments are spent sitting in the recliner wondering if my ankles will every go back to a normal size.  I know they will, this isn't my first rodeo, but at 38 weeks, it is starting to feel like this is never going to end.

Anyway, knitting!  I have been knitting and I even started a crochet project.  A crochet project that will probably NOT be done by the time baby comes.  Maybe?

I thought I would show you my favorite knit that I have made for Posy, poor baby has a blog name but no real name yet!

It is this Tin Can Knits sweater.  I do not get a commission from them, so trust me here, I adore their patterns.  And hey, if they did give me a commission it would all go towards their patterns and yarn anyway.  The pattern is the i heart rainbows sweater.

I was so afraid of it but once I got going I was totally in love.  I made it short sleeve, though, because I do have to admit, that the idea of knitting with fingering weight navy blue yarn for one more row might have driven me mad.

It really was my favorite knit, probably of the whole year!

As for reading?  Well most of that is baby name lists these days.

And here is a sneak peek at Posy, all squished.  She is running out of room folks!

38 weeks and counting.

Oh and I guess I better start thinking about Christmas crafting, huh?



Nicole at Frontier Dreams


Monday, September 29, 2014

4th Birthday!

Not too long ago we celebrated another birthday... ok, it was like a month ago... 
but I am finally posting about it!  

I had planned on a Frozen theme but due to chaos, it got streamlined quite a bit.  It involved mostly watching the movie, opening presents and enjoying a Dairy Queen ice cream cake.  

I made Sweet Pea some peg dolls, like I did for Buttercup.  I am hoping to make a peg doll for each of the kids on their birthday for their cakes, this year.  Last year it was pillowcases, this year wooden dolls of themselves!

I also made her Saint Sophia and her three daughters: Faith, Hope, and Love.  
I of course, cannot find them right now, but luckily I got a shot of them on Instagram before I completely finished.

I have really enjoyed doing the peg doll makeovers.  I still have some more to go, 
but I think they will have to wait till after the baby comes!

Sunday, September 28, 2014

Amy Caroline's Daybook ~ September 28, 2014

I don't usually like to write on Sunday, but I felt that even 1 day over a month was a bit long to not post!  So hello again.  Sorry, didn't mean to be gone that long but life has been very busy lately and I thought the best way to share what we have been up to is with a Daybook.  So are you ready?  Here we go!

Outside my window...
It is a beautiful early Autumn day.  The sky is blue, dotted with fluffy white clouds and after such a long time the air actually does not smell like smoke!

I am thankful for...
We had a substantial rain the other day and it helped to contain if not completely put out all the fires that were burning in our area.    I was absolutely giddy!  We had been praying every night for the fire fighters and for God to send, to quote Bear, "Big, fat, juicy rain."

I am thinking about...
This has been such a hard year.  I mean, we have had hard years in the past, everyone does, but this was a very different hard.  It is a scary thought when you realize that sometimes things happen in our lives and we just don't know what to do.  If it were a physical ailment you would go to the doctor.  But when things on a more deeper level come to surface it isn't so easy as, "Take two of these and call me in the morning."

This has been a year where we discovered the importance of prayer.  And it had been on my mind quite a lot lately.

From the kitchen...
Sooooo.... I was diagnosed with Gestational Diabetes at 36 weeks.  Yup, not 28 weeks, but 36.  I was going to a midwife and I started to worry that the new clinic wasn't being as careful as I felt they should be.  So at that late stage I decided to go back to my OB.  At my first appointment they wanted me to have a glucose test to make sure, since I hadn't really had one at 28 weeks.  Well I failed.  Came back a few days later for the 3 hour and FAILED.

So for the last week I have been trying to control it quite successfully with diet.  But that means no carbs, no sugar.  I tried one homemade gluten free pancake with only butter one morning and it sent my numbers crazy out of control.  So I am being very careful.  Now I know why I was feeling so sick every Sunday morning after my two pancakes with syrup!

I am creating...
I am almost done with a little baby dress for the baby who will be here in only a few weeks!  I also started working on a pair of knit pants in the sweetest shade of purple.

Other than that I am working hard on this little wee babe!

I am praying for...
The baby.  Life this pregnancy was not easy or peaceful.  So I am sending up lots of rosaries and prayers for this little wee one.  After my last appointment, they told me that with the gestational diabetes and my age (because I am so decrepit at 40) they will induce me probably at 39 weeks.

I am reading...
How to Raise Good Catholic Children by Mary Reed Newland.  I am really enjoying it so far.  It is a good encouragement for parents!  Our local parish has also just stared a Bible study that will be going on during religous education and we are reading A Well-Built Faith: A Catholic's Guide to Knowing and Sharing What We Believe.  It looks like it is going to be a really good book and class!

I am hearing...
Some of the kids are outside playing and Daisy is practicing her piano.  It is actually quite peaceful... for the moment!

Around the house...
We are getting ready for our new arrival, which could be here in about 2 weeks!!  *GULP*  I am washing baby clothes, buying last minute items, and nesting a wee bit.

One of my favorite things...
This is where I want to whine about chocolate and how much I want to swim in a vat of chocolate peanut butter ice cream.  But I won't.  I won't go there.

A few plans this week...
I have to get two non stress tests a week now and an OB appointment.  Then add on top of that schooling the kids, piano lessons, and such, there is no such thing as a "few" plans around here!

A few (blurry) moments from last week...

God Bless!!