Friday, September 2, 2016

(FF): It's Not You, It's Me

Dear Running,

I would like to introduce you to my new friend.  It's name is Bing  isn't it great?

After these few months with you and finally accomplishing that 5K (although a lot of it was walked), I came to realize one very sad fact:  Running, you are not my sport.  I worked hard on loving you.  I pinned inspiring running quotes, I followed every inspiring thing about you I could find on Facebook and Instagram.  I would get on that treadmill 3 times a week and do that Couch 2 5 K program and kept telling myself over and over again that I loved you.

But, you see, I was kind of lying to myself.

Wait, don't get me wrong!  There were things I truly loved about you, Running.  I loved that when I finished I felt like I had accomplished something.  I loved how I felt empowered.  Most of all, I loved that I was able to do something I never thought I could do.  You helped me do that.

The sad reality, however, is that love was not true.  I had to have the perfect conditions to be with you, Running.  I had to have good music.  NO ONE could watch me.  I have slight asthma, so I had to watch my breathing very closely and found that I could not run very fast, or else you would bring on an attack.  I had a horrible time running with anyone else (I always have).  I felt self conscious and like I was holding people back.  So I preferred to run alone, in a little cocoon, hiding my shame.

I don't want to hurt you, but... I never dreamed of naming my treadmill.

I named my bike Bing.

Riding a bike always makes me ridiculously happy.  Ask anyone who has ever gone on a bike ride with me.  I will be singing Roger's and Hammerstein's greatest hits as I sail down a hill.  If I'm at home on my recumbent, I can watch TV, I could probably even knit, though my knees would probably get in the way.  One of the funniest things that I love about riding my recumbent at home, in my room, is that I can read.  No one can read while running.  Yes, yes, I suppose you could listen to an audio book, but I had to do so much self motivation I can't imagine it would have kept me going.

I was so discouraged right before the 5K when I had a health issue, when the doctor told me you were likely to blame.  I had to pull away from you, Running, and it was only right before the race that I was told I could run again.  Once I healed after all that, you kept hurting me every time I got on the treadmill.  I pulled a muscle in my leg THREE times.

That was when I had to put my poor treadmill on Craigslist and trade it for Bing.    Almost instantly I was reminded that I could get that feeling of accomplishment and empowerment while also experiencing joy and fun!

So I am sorry running.  It's not you really.  A lot of people love you, especially women.  And I totally get why.  I really do.  But it is over between us.  You see, cycling always makes me happy, in a way you never could.  I wish you the best and hope that we can always be friends.

See you on the roads,
Amy Caroline

1 comment:

  1. I am glad that you found an alternative. I much prefer riding my bike to running...and so does my body.


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